Snark Watch

Snark Watch: September 2, 2020

While Watching | What Happened | Thoughts 

While Watching

What Happened

  • Sonny, Carly, and Felix took Mike to the track, er, to the set that doubles as the Cassadine stables because Frank hired a horse. Jason disappeared at some point and was not on today.
  • Sonny and Mike’s scenes were sweet and reminded me of my grandmother which wasn’t fun, but I’m still not buying this story. I have lots of thoughts.
  • Anna and Robert were on, showing these fools how it’s done. Maxie and Peter were on, but who cares.
  • Lulu and Dustin visited Brook who remains salty.
  • Sasha and Chase talked about telling Michael and Willow the truth now that Nelle is gone. Chase hid in the bushes and realized that Willow is moving on (I’ll get to why), and Sasha went to talk Brook into giving Chase a chance because…I don’t know. Sasha’s weird, dude.
  • Carly and Sonny had a talk in the stables that was boring and I missed.
  • Michael and Willow talked about backgammon. I shit you not. Also, Michael pretended that he was close to Mike growing up which is a filthy lie.
  • Ned tried to talk Olivia out of going to see Dante because Olivia needs to stay in Port Charles and RAISE HIS KID because Ned is a selfish bitch who can’t be bothered to figure out how to run his own life. Olivia said, PEACE OUT, and left with Robert. They were the best part.
  • Previews: Sam’s back to whine about Valentin, Spinelli found something interesting on his computer, and Anna is going to see Alex in Berlin.


Uh, today seemed to be a transition show mostly. Reorienting things after the Nurse’s Ball and the kidnapping. The terrible group of idiots (Willow, Sasha, Michael, and Chase) were all on, talking about their situation. Setting things up so that Sasha can be depressed and alone so she can be a coke addict, while Chase flirts with Brook, and Michael and Willow play backgammon. (I just–)

The Mike storyline is winding down and we’re doing a lot of pretending about how much Sonny gave a shit about Mike at any point in his life. I think that’ll be my big article this weekend, but I’m honestly mixed on this. The performances are great, and they’ve clearly done their research because a lot of this feels like when I lost my grandmother. But it’s false because no one, including this show, ever gave a single fuck about Mike Corbin, and pretending differently is making it hard for me to care. Sometimes I do, but then they start talking about all these memories Sonny had with his father, and Carly is all — I love Mike, and Michael’s waxing poetic about his grandfather — to be honest — it’s all a retcon.

The Peter storyline was on, but I’m ignoring it exists until the show decides Peter is actually a villain. They can’t decide, and I’m not giving them any energy until they do.

The Ned and Olivia stuff is the best part of the show because it feels real, honest, and rooted in character. Plus, I’m intrigued by Olivia and Robert in scenes together. I don’t know why.

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